Wounded Angels
by Hollow Ichigo-Ichigo
Summary: Ichigo's life has been nothing but hell since his mom died. Now, when he attempts to finally end it all, his secret crush becomes his salvation. Will Ichigo find new meaning in life, or will the shadows of his past take away his last joy? Yaoi rape c.d.
1. Chapter 1

Authoress Drabble~!

Alright then~! Me and vphunter decided to have a friendly contest; who can write and post the most dark and depressing fic? Well, we'll let you guys decide! The limit is 15 chappies max, and put in as much angst as possible~! So yeah, this is gonna be dark. I have chosen HichiIchi as my pairing (duh!) and I shall be as evil as possible, gurantee it~! Ok, so here's the first chappie of Fallen Angels, and I do hope you'll vote in my poll once the story is over! ^_^

* * *

_Another day...another pain._

_Another day of sitting in the rain._

_It falls down from above, like tears._

_As if the angels are crying, reeling from their fears..._

Ichigo stopped swinging and stared at the begining of his new poem. He sighed as he sat there, the clouds above him darkening. _Looks like rain..._he thought idly. He closed his small notebook. It was black, embroided with small white lillies surrounding an angel, large white wings spreading from it's back, the feathers covered in blood. He picked up his bookbag and slung it over his shoulder, cradling the journal, holding it against his chest. Inside were dozens of pictures and poems, each one reflecting how he felt and thought. As he walked slowly to school, he looked around anxiously, hoping to not bump into one of his many fears, and pains, in his life.

"Tsk, look at the cowering Berry." He flinched as a red headed student teased him. "What, ya think people are out to get ya?"

"Hi Renji..."he whispered, his voice hoarse. He didn't get enough sleep the night before, and it showed. Dark circles were shown under his warm brown eyes, making them almost toffee in apperence. He slid his coat on more as the rain began to fall softly. He also did it to hide yet another pain, one not always so generous.

"Don't say 'hi' ta me, ya piece of gay garbage!" He snapped, shoving Ichigo harshly, kocking him into a puddle from the rain the night before. He stayed there as others laughed and pointed at him, making fun of him. All of the insults hit him, but all he could do was remind himself of his father's words.

_You're useless, and nothing will ever change that!_

_I'm useless..._he thought and he bowed his head, his orange hair peaking from under his hood. _I'm no good to this school...to my dad...to anyone...I'm alone... _People starting walking past him, spalshing in the puddle he was sitting in and snickering as they walked past. He got up slowly and checked to see if his journal was dry. To him, the small journal was his last remaning connection to reality and a hiding place from his own, drowing agony. Sometimes he wanted to end it all...but there was someone keeping him here...someone who would never look at him or speak to him because he was useless...because he was gay. As he walked into class, he looked where his life line sat. _Hichigo Shirosaki..._

* * *

Hichigo Shirosaki, or Shiro, as he preferred, stared idly at the board, as the teacher sighed. "You're late again, ." He looked up to see the orange headed student walk in, dripping from head to toe. "Next time you're late, it's detention."

"Yes, Ms. Ochi..." Ichigo whispered quietly. Shiro watched as he shuffled past the other desks, not once looking at anyone, but holding close to him a small black journal. This behavior was normal for Ichigo, or as normal as it gets. Shiro was new to the school, but was already very popular. He looked back up at the board asa Ichigo sat down, his clothes making a soft squish as he did. He was soaking wet, and begining to shiver, but he refused to take his coat off, save for the hood.

"Ichigo, are you alright?" The teacher asked. Shior noticed some boys snickering in ther corner of the room.

_Delinquents..._he thought.

"Do you want me to call your father?"

"No!" Shiro turned back around to see Ichigo's wide brown eyes filled with fear, but it was brief. He then cleared his throat and shook his head. "No Ms. Ochi. I slipped outside, that's all. I'll be ok." Ms. Ochi gave him a nervous glance, but said nothing. Shiro couldn't help but notice the sad, dripping figure in the corner and wondered why he was so scared of his own father.

* * *

Ichigo sat under a small tree in the school yard as everyone sat at the tables, eating their lunches. He was scribling in his journal, writing about the day so far.

_July 12th 12:45 pm_

_I was knocked down again by Renji today. I'm all soaking wet now, and dad will be mad at me...what should I do? _

He looked back up to see Shiro sitting with some other people, people whom he'd known all his life, people that used to be his friends. But now that high school had reared its ugly head, they had all turned on him. He quickly looked back down at his journal and continued to write again.

_I noticed that Shiro had been watching me talk to the teacher. I thought that...maybe he was actually worried. Ha, imagine that, eh journal? He doesn't care, just like everyone else in this school...or in this world. But just seeing him...even that small thing is comfort for me...I wonder why?_

"Hey, Berry head! Bell rang!" Ichigo looked up just in time to have mud being slung into his face and hear Renji cackle as they all walked back to class. Ichigo just rubbed the mud off of his cheek and walked back to class, not noticing Shiro's concerned glance as he past. As he sat back down, he quickly checked his wirsts, flinching as one of the scars from the night before reopened. He quickly pulled his sleeve back down, glancing nervously to make sure no one saw. When he was certain nobody saw, he pulled out his pencil and began to copy the work on the board. Suddenly, something wet hit the back of his head, but he did his best to ignore it. He could hear Renji and his friends snickering behind him and they launched another spit ball to the back of his head. When the third one hit, he heard Ms. Ochi snap.

"Will you boys knock it off back there!" Ichigo just kept copying the board, not wanting to attract anymore unwanted attention.

"Yes Ms Ochi." Renji said, trying to sound sorry.

"I'll see you after class, Mr. Abarai." She said before turning back to the board. For some reason, Ichigo couldn't help but feel fear filling his heart.

_I should be relieved..._he thought. _But I'm scared... _

* * *

"You're late!" Ichigo just barely missed getting hit in the face with another beer bottle that was flung his direction.

"Sorry dad." He muttered, hoping to get to his room before anything else went wrong.

"No you ain't!" His dad snapped, getting up and heading towards him. Ichigo instantly shrank back, the alcohol on his dad's breath making him sick. "you ain't never sorry!

"Yes dad."

"It's all your fault y'know...the reason Masaki passed away."

"Yes dad, I know."

"Ya do, eh?" His dad leaned in closer, Ichigo feeling himself begining to shake with fear. What was his dad going to do now? "Do you know why it's your fault?"

"No dad."

"It's because you're useless. You're a useless, piece of trash whore." Ichigo looked at the floor, his feet shifting around as old memories surfaced to the front of his mind. "Usless, gay piece of trash. It's no surprise no one wants you."

"Yes dad." It was all Ichigo could say to prevent things from getting out of control. His dad raised his hand and smacked him in the face, snapping his head to the left. Ichigo kept his face turned away, afraid that he'd do something far worse, but his dad just backed away and headed back to the couch. Silently and slowly, he walked to his room, tossing his book on the bed and grabbing for a small pocket knife on his dresser. He rolled his sleeves up slowly, checking the damage from his previous endeavours. He took the knife and made three cuts on his left, two on his right. He winced slightly as pain shot through his body, but sighed as he felt his own, emotional pain temporarily fade away, the old memories once again retreating into his mind. _Better..._he reminded himself. _This is better than all of this... _He set the knife down and wrapped his wrists up.

Grabbing his journal, he opened the pages up to his newest poem and began doodling underneath it. It showed a pure white skinned angel holding a black, withered rose in his hand, black feathered wings spreading from behind him. Another angel was there, arms wrapped around the neck of the other, holding a knife to his neck, as if threatning to slit his throat. The other angels wings were white, but dripping with blood, like the angel on the cover. The other angel had flowing orange hair, so it ws hard to guess the gender, but Ichigo knew. There were tears on both of their cheeks, as if the one regretted having to kill the other. He sighed and then continued to add to the poem.

_One holds a knife, ruthless and cold._

_While the other holds a rose, withered and old._

_The love between them, one sided and fake._

_One's soul is for the other to take._

He closed the journal, uncertain of now where the poem should go. He heard fierce banging on his door and he quickly got up to lock it. "Ichigo Kurosaki! Open this fucking door right now!" He sta there, shivering from his wet clothes and fear. His dad had gotten into the room before, and he had no doubt he would do it again.

"Father, please don't..." He whispered quietly as his dad unlocked his bedroom door. Ichigo closed his eyes as his dad descended upon him, like the Furies did the dead men of ancient times, a bottle in his hands. Ichigo covered his head as best as he could, trying to hide away from the raining blows as his dad cursed at him, blaming him for the death of his mother and sisters, blaming him for losing his own job, blaming him for everything. The only thing Ichigo could do was agree, but not out loud, not without risking his chances of increasing his father's wrath. Finally, after felt like an eternity, his dad left the room, slamming the door as he went. Ichigo tried to move from his curled up spot on the bed. He knew he couldn't fall asleep in his wet and now bloody cothes, but darkness was creeping in on him swiftly. His entire body hurt, but his heart and soul suffered the most. As he dipped into unconsiousness, all he could think to himself was this. _My dad's right...I have no need to be here anymore..._

* * *

Chapter 1 end

Well, not too bad for a first chappie if I must say so myself, eh? I hope y'all will participate in this little challange. If you don't wanna take sides, that's fine. This is just a friendly competition between the two of us, so there will be no hard feelings towards the other, I promise! ^_^ Well, reviews would be really awesome and prevent me from crying from writing what I am writing. XD


	2. Chapter 2

Response to reviews~!

Tiana Misoro: Hey, calm down girl!

FeelTheBeat: Thanks a ton! XD

shirishi senri: Is the Senri part from +Anima? O.O

soutaicho AJ: Lol Yes ya do!

Nikki Yosida: Holy crap it gets worse. XD

Angelchan2012: I'm going all the way here!

Metallic efekt: Thank you!

HichixIchi Love: I hope I don't let you down! ^_^

krito 1389: I needed him to be like this. Don't worry; you'll see why he's like that sooner or later. XD

ravensterling123: Wow! Thanks!

hey: Uh...heh. *blushes* I'm not that inspiring...

OKami23Kitsune: I've turned people into HichiIchi fans before. 8D

Strawberry-Ringo: Hmm...maybe.

Rock4Rox: I wanna say the Rox means Roxas, but I dunno...XD

herRhi-chan: Aren't I violent? X3

Cerulean-Guave: Now now now, that isn't nice. XD

person: Yeah, I know...but I'm only human. XD

vphunter: I will go all the way on this, you can count on it~! ^_^

dp: Wow...one already? We haven't even finished yet!

ttuytu: I'm good at depressing. XD

fix23: Yet another thing you'll just have to send to me. XD

Ok then! I'm glad to see this running so smoothly~! Oh, but please, don't make a decision until the stories are completed. I dunno how long mine's gonna be exactly, but like I said, I'm gonna try ta go all the way. (across the sky...so intense! X3) Now...to add two more characters to my dance. XD Enjoy~! Oh! And vphunter's fic in this challenge is Tasteless Tactics!

* * *

Grimmjow Jeagerjaques smiled as he shifted through his small photo album. He touched one of the pictures, a picure of an orange haired teenager shifting througha crowd of people. _Mine..._he thought to himself. _Ichigo is mine... _He closed the book and once again searched the phone book for his house number. Him and Ichigo used to date before Ichigo moved away, and broke up. Grimmjow didn't understand why. He wasn't a stalker; he was _worried_ for his little orange fireball. He glanced through his pictures some more, sighing as he gazed on them. Oh how he wanted the Berry back with him, in his bed, making those cute noises he always made. Always begging for Grimmjow to stop. _But I know...love always hurts..._Grimmjow reminded himself. He slammed the phone book down in a huff and headed off to bed. _I'll find him soon...this I promise..._

* * *

Shiro walked down the steps of his house as his mother fixed his lunch. "Mom, I'm 15 now. I can fix my own damned lunch."

"And you're running late as usual, so you don't have time." His mom argued from within the kitchen. When he stepped into the room, he just sighed. His mom had her soft, blonde hair up in a ponytail, her green eyes sparkling and laughing at him. No, she wasn't his biological mother, but he loved her like she was. "So hurry the hell up and eat breakfast!"

_Ah, there's the curse word of the day..._he thought. He quickly shoved a granola bar in his mouth and rushed out the door. As he did, he past by the swing set he usualyy saw Ichigo on, writing away in his small journal. Today he wasn't there. _Maybe I missed him..._he decided. When he walked into the school building, he heard a crashing noise in the hallway, followed by laughter. He rushed over and saw Ichigo, leaning his back against the lockers, his head bleeding a little from a cut above his eye, and Renji stalking off, laughing. _Goddamned bastard!_

"Excuse me..." Shiro looked down to see Ichigo trying to crawl in front of him. "You're...in front of my locker." Shiro stared at him. He was wearing the same, wet clothes from yesterday, his face seemed slightly flushed and he was shaking.

"Hey...do you need help?" He leaned down and looked Ichigo in they eyes and froze. Ichigo's warm, brown eyes were filled to the brim with sadness, yet there was a lifelessness to them, and this look worried Shiro.

"No..." Ichigo looked down at the floor as his blood dripped from the cut above his eyes. He rubbed it with his sleeve, and Shiro just barely caught a glimpse of the bandages onn his wrist.

"You don't _seem_ fine." He retorted and stood back up, holding his hand out to Ichigo. Ichigo ignored it and opened his locker, grabbed his journal and stood up on shaky legs, walking past the albino. Now certain that something was wrong, he decided to follow him after school. _I'm not liking this at all..._

* * *

Ichigo sat in class, taking one last good look at the classroom. Today, he decided, would be it. Today he would get rid of his uselessness, no matter what people said or thought. But then, Shiro tried to help him in the hallway. He wanted to reach out and grab the hand that had been extended to him, but he thought that it was false pity. _There's no way someone like him could care for someone like me..._he told himself. _I'm useless..._

"Ichigo?" He turned from his notebook to see giving his teacher giving him a worried glance. "Are you paying attention?"

"Yes Ms. Ochi " He replied, his voice emotionless and empty. He knew she didn't care either, but then again, she didn't care about anyone; she was a teacher. To prove it, she walked was then that he locked eyes with Shiro's golden ones and the world froze, if only for a moment. He shook his head and reminded himself of his choice. _Not even Shiro will keep me from making myself useful..._he reminded himself, quickly burying his head in his journal. Today's picture was of an angel falling from a great height, feathers tearing off bloody wings as another angel calls from above, reaching out and crying for the other to return. He returned to his previous poem and added some more.

_As one falls from endless skies_

_The other reaches out with pain filled cries_

_The angel falls_

_Oblivious to the calls_

The bell rang and he sighed. With the day now over, it was time for him to go. What he didn't know was that not too far behind him was a certain albino teen, eyes filled with concern.

* * *

Shiro decided that he'd follow Ichigo home. Yes, it seemed stalkerish, but what choice did he have? Ichigo was in saome kind of trouble, that much had been clear to him from the day before. He wanted to help the orange head. But how? He watched as Ichigo seemed to walk slowly and awkwardly, as if his leg had a limp. They walked for some time until Ichigo stopped at the huge bridge that connected both sides of town that was split by the river. His heart froze as Ichigo placed his stuff down and crawled outside the guardrail. "Wait! Stop!" Shiro called, but too late. Ichigo released his hands, and fell straight into the quickly flowing river.

Without so much as a second thought, Shiro tore his coat off and lept over the edge, getting slammed by the icy water. Although it was mid July, the water still felt really cold. The current dragged him around, but he quickly caught side of the teenager. He swam towards him, the water carrying him off like a ragdoll. He managed to grab ahold of his coat and swam as best as he could to the surface. But Ichigo was caught. He looked down and noticed Ichigo's unresponsive face, lax and emotionless. He swam and managed to pull Ichigo out of his coat. As he surfaced, he dragged Ichigo towards the stony banks and began applying pressure to his chest, trying to pump the water out of him. Ichigo gave off a weak cough and water sputterd from his mouth.

"Wh...wha...?" He stuttered, his entire body shivering with cold. All he wanted to do was sleep, he felt so tired. But the person above him was shaking him so much, he couldn't sleep. Would the guy just leave him alone? Shiro felt worried as he stared into Ichigo's fluttering eyes. Sleeping was the _last_ thing the teen needed.

"Hey, can you tell me your name?" He asked as he lifted him into his arms, carrying him bridal style. He rushed towards his house, where warmth would help them both.

"Ichigo...Kurosaki..." The teen's voice was nothing more than a fluttering whisper and shiro felt fear run through his blood. He asked him a barrage of questions as he rushed towards his house. He had to hurry!

* * *

Chapter 2 end~!

Yippe~! Here's Chappie 2! Well, my stepdad changed the password on the computer, so my updates will be even slower now...sorry. Idk when anything will get updated again, but I promise I'll try! Review please!


	3. Chapter 3

Response to reviews~!

FeeltheBeat: Yes...sadness...

soutaicho AJ: agreed.

Nikki Yosida: I feel awkwardly rushed now...XD

Angelchan 2012: The hint that he's a stalker wasn't good enough for ya? O.o

Shiro-Ichi Obsession: Lol So true and thanks!

kurosaki9: Yeah...save one's a psychopath. DX

hey: Wowie! Violent review! XD

HichixIchi Love: That rhymes!

DarkenedHeartandMind: You're penname rules! XD And yes...yes it will. If you like this, give Anthem of the Angels a view!

OKami23Kitsune: I have converted yet another person! XD If you ever write a fic, lemme know!

Cerulean-Guave: You're the only person to pick that up...DX Thnx!

ravensterling123: Lol

fujiwarakaharu: Glad ya enjoy that.

BonneNuit: *passes out from compliment* I'm glad ya think so! I do too, but there are still better people.

mrsichigodarcy: No, just social networking. Btw, ur pic is the ultimate kawaii~!

herRhi-chan: Umm...ain't ya a girl? XD

fix23: Agreed. XD

Tiana Misoro: Hey, I wouldn't be doing that if I were you!

none-4-a-name: Hey...I feel offended for some reason. Look, if you no like, don't read! XP

no namer: Grimmjow. Also, all of the HichiIchi in my faves r good! Go read 'em~!

ValentineRevenge: Tee hee thanx!

no namer 2: There's a first for everything~!

Manga Zeal: Good! XD

Okie dokie then! Now things will get fun~! I'm now gonna do this from Ichigo and Shiro's POV! Fun eh? I'll do it third person every now and then, but I thought this would help out some, so you can understand this story better. XD So here we go~!

* * *

Chapter 3: Fevered love

Ichigo's POV

Sometimes, I see ghosts. My father used to say it was a gift...but now he says I'm insane. If that's true...then why did I try to do the sane thing? Ending my useless, waste-of-space existence...it seemed right. But as I had floated there, I saw my mother. 'Not yet' she had told me. 'Wait a little longer'. Wait? Wait for what? More pain? More disappointment? Right now, my entire body was burning. Was it because I hadn't made it to Heaven and ended up in Hell, just like everyone said I would? No...now there's a cooling sensation on my forehead...what's going on? I make an attempt to open my eyes, but they hurt so fucking badly.

"Oh good, you're awake." A soft voice was whispering to me.

"M-mom?"

"Afraid not honey." When my vision clears up a little, I stare at green eyes and long, silver...no, _blonde_ hair.

"Sh-Shirosaki?"

"Close enough. My name is Serena Shirosaki. You can just call me Serena." She said, pressing a washcloth to my burning forehead again. Didn't take a rocket scientist to see I had a fever. "Look, I don't know what the hell happened, but please stay here and rest for awhile, ok?" Tsk, I wasn't going anywhere. Doesn't she see this? How useless I am?

"H-how d-d-did I get h-here?" I asked, my voice hoarse.

"Ah, my son brought you. That stupid idiot! After he dropped you off, he ran back to get your bag and now he's got a cold. I told him not t-" But I'm already drowning her out. If Shiro is her son...then he's the one who saved me. So now it's my fault he's sick. My fault...always my fault..._Always..._

* * *

Shiro's POV

I let out another sneeze as my mom opens the door. "It's what you get, you dumbass." Ah, _second_ curse word of the day.

"What? No-" Sneeze "-kind words for the sickly?" My mom laughed and gave me two small pills.

"The 'sickly' is the one in the other room, which, if I remember correctly, is _your_ room." She said, her tone now getting edgy. "Hichi, I don't like this." That was her nickname for me, which she only calls me when she's _really_ worried.

"Like what?"

"Hichi...he has scars..." That gets my attention. I knew that something was wrong with Ichigo...but this... "Please reconsider your...crush for this boy." It's true, I had a crush on Ichigo Kurosaki. Ever since I had started coming to Karakura High School, he had always...drawn me to him, without ever realizing it. I've been wanting to speak to him, but every time I tried, he either left or 'other' things were going on. I wanted to help him, but not in the way you think. His bright orange hair, duller than it should be I'm sure, showed a firey personality that is now nothing but embers trying to flicker in his eternal downpour. His soft brown eyes, dull and lifeless now, showed years of pain and neglect...pain I knew all to well and wanted him to be rid of.

"Mom, I can't help whom I crush on. That stuff just-" Cough "-happens." She shook her head and handed me a cup of water.

"I understand..but you were so close once...do you remember?" Hell, I was a lot closer to commiting 'The Act' as she called it, than she thinks. But I'll never tell her about that one. She shakes her head and gets up, walking towards the door. She watches me a moment more to make sure I swallow my pills. "Just please...if he doesn't want help, don't give it." She says and leaves me. Alone and to my thoughts. Ha, goodie. I lean back and stare up at the ceiling. Just like in my room, those cheap ass plastic starts and planets. Damn I need to remove them from my ceiling. I yawn as the pills quickly take affect, making me drowsy...Well, some sleep may do me some good...

* * *

Ichigo's POV

When I woke up, I knew what I needed to do. The medicine in my body didn't dull my mind from my need to leave this place...this world...I slowly rose out of the soft bed I was sleeping in and fumbled towards the stairs. I gripped the rail harshly, my vision swimming. I flinched when my feet hit cold linolium flooring, shivering as I looked for something...anything to end it.

"What do ya think you're doing?" I froze as a voice slid across my skin, an arm wrapping around my waist. I tried to pry myself out of his grip, but he held on tightly. "Uh-huh...I know what it is you're doing."

"Then why not let me do it?" I asked, my voice quiet and slurred. I knew who this was...but I didn't want to see him...no, I _couldn't_ see him. Bad things would happen I'm told... "I have no meaning in this world...I just waste space..."

"_I_ don't think you do. In fact..." He turned me around and I was forced to stare into his beautiful golden and black eyes. God no...what was he doing to me? "I think there's too much space here between you and I." I shivered at these words as I felt myself sliding towards the floor, I can't hold myself up anymore. "Ichigo..." He whispered my name and it sent tingles up my spine.

"S-say it again..."

"What?"

"My name..." What the hell is wrong with me? He leaned down close to my lips...so close...so damned close...

"_Ichigo.._." He then pressed his lips against mine and a pleasing fire spread throughout my entire body. This had to be a dream...a cruel trick my mind was playing on me...but at this point now I didn't care. He was kissing me...Shiro was kissing me...and I felt as if I was no longer burning in Hell, but on my way up to Heaven...

* * *

Shiro's POV

I had seen him walking down the steps and decided to follow him. After that...everything went crazy. Next thing I know I'm kissing him, and by god was it _amazing_. I had never experienced a kiss like this...enough to brun my soul. And if that's what he was doing, then I'll let him do it. If it'll help him see that he means something to some people...if it'll help him erase his pain...I'll let him do it...

* * *

Chapter 3 end

Well I wasted no time getting to romance neh? XD


	4. Chapter 4

Response to reviews~!

Sorry this one hasn't been updated in awhile. In a bit of a rut, and just to say there won't be smut...sorry. But c'mon! They're both damaged in their own ways...so here's the next chappie~!

* * *

Chapter 4: Secrets

Ichigo's POV

4 months later...

I still couldn't believe this. Me and Shiro...we'd been dating now for at least four months, and things seemed, I don't know; better now. He helped me sneak as much of my stuff as possible out of my dad's and now I live with him and his mom. Serena is a very nice woman, much like my own mother...speaking of, I haven't seen her ghost since that day at the bridge. "Something on your mind?" I turned to see his beautiful golden eyes staring at me with some concern. "You haven't...lapsed again have you?" I shook my head. The pain dissapered after he had stopped me once. I can remember it well too...

* * *

3 moths ago...

I was sitting there in the bathroom, a blade held against my wrist when I heard a knock. "Y-yeah?"

"Ichigo! You've been in there for thirty minutes! I want a shower here!" Shiro called and I tried to clean up my mess. Oh, what would he do if he saw this? would he reject me, kick me out? The mere thought had me dragging the blade across my wrist again and this time, the pain didn't leave...why wouldn't it leave? !

"I...I'm almost done!" I heard a click and turned to see Shiro holding the bathroom key and staring at my wrists. "Sh...Shiro I-"

"Ichigo...let me help you here." He was calm...why? He reached out and grabbed a washcloth and wet it, using it to wipe away the blood on my wrists and hands. He was quiet...why was he quiet?

"Shiro..."

"Ichigo, you can't do this anymore ok?"

"Why? Will you kick me out?" I asked, sounding a bit harsher than I meant to. He looked at me with sad, worried eyes.

"I would never do that to you Ichigo. But this..." He held up my wrist as he put gauze on it, wrapping my wrists tightly. "...It has to stop. How can I help you if you won't help yourself some? I can't do everything Ichigo..."

* * *

Present...

After that, it had never happened again. They were pale lines now, probably would never go away, but still; I would never do it again. "It's just...I haven't seen my mom in a few years so..."

"We can go visit if you'd like." Shiro smiled at me and I felt my stomach flutter. God did I love him...but I still didn't have the guts to say those three words to his face. I must be a coward. I nodded and he smiled, ruffling my messy hair. No matter what I do to it, it's always a mess. Serena just says it's the way my hair is meant to be, while Shiro says it reflects my unruly personality. Seriously, that's not fair! But you know what? I really don't give a damn.

* * *

Shiro's POV

Four whole months. To me, it feels like we've known each other for so long...maybe it's because of my awkward...well gift as my mom calls it. I don't know about that exactly, but I'll humor her. As we walked up the cemetary steps, I couldn't help but notice how uneasy Ichigo seemed. "Are you ok?"

"Y-Yeah...i'll be ok." He murmered, sounding rather far away. I pity him; I haven't lost any relatives, and for what he's been through...I guess there we share a common path. Thinking that pain will get rid of the emotional pain, letting yourself keep going until you could just fade away...been there, done that. Maybe that's part of the reason why I felt the need to help Ichigo (excluding my crush on him mind you!)

"You sure? If not we can-"

"Trust me Shiro. This is something I _need_ to do." I can understand that one and I stay silent. Instead, I run a hand up his tan arm. He's no longer sickly looking, but healthy and, might I dare venture there, sexy. He had sun kissed skin, his brown eyes now shined with life. His hair was vibrant now, and although it may look like a mess, it felt right for it to stay that way. When we got to the top, he instantly rushed off, and I followed. He kneeled in front of a large tombstone and I read the name.

"Misaki Kurosaki..."

"My mom...she was a good person. Dad and I loved her so much..." He placed a hand gently on her stone and I kneeled next to him.

"If she's anything like you, than I wish I could meet her. Maybe I will someday." I said, smiling as he sighed and nodded. He needed this, he was right about that. I placed my hand on his and he looked at me, his beautiful brown eyes begining to shine with long unshed tears. I just pull him to me and felt his head lean heavily against my chest as he began to cry. I let him; why not? Hell, I almost joined in. Because Misaki died, Ichigo's dad blew a fuse or something, and took it out on his son...

"I...I _do_ see her though..." I look at him and he sniffs. Rain's begining to fall, but its light so I'm not to worried. His face is red and there are tear tracks on his face.

"What do you mean?" I ask. He seems nervous and looks away. I grab his chin gently and force him to look at me. "You know you can tell me Ichigo."

"I...you'll think i'm nuts."

"C'mon, you know me; I wouldn't think that. Just tell me, ok?" He sighs and looks at me with determination, but slight fear as well.

"I can see ghosts."

* * *

Ichigo's POV

He was staring; why was he staring? ! Did he...really think i'm nuts? He shook his head and sighed. "Is that all you were worried about?" The question caught me off guard.

"Uh...I, ummm..." He chuckled and kissed my lips softly before continuing.

"I can see the future." Now it was my turn to stare. Was he being serious? ! "So tell me more about the ghosts, and I'll share more about seeing the future."

"I...w-well sometimes their see through, other times solid as rock. I can't always talk to them, but they know I can see them. I saw mom...a few months ago...she told me to wait a little longer." I didn't have to elaborate when I saw her; he could guess.

"Well, sometimes I get these odd senses of deja vu. When I fall asleep, I have these...dreams and I watch them from...kind of a third person viewpoint. I can't always remember what I see, but I know it when it actually happens because of the deja vu feeling." Shiro explained. For some reason, I believed him. Why not? If I can see spirits, he can see the future.

"We're weird aren't we?" I asked and he chuckled. He wrapped his long, pale arms around me and held me close, whispering into my hair.

"And I wouldn't have us any other way. I love you, Ichigo." I felt my heart choke and all I can reply with is;

"Me too Shiro." Seriously...a coward.

* * *

Grimmjow's POV

I know he's here, my little strawberry. I need to protect him from his mad father, even if it means forcing him. It's for his own good can't he see that? No matter...I know where he lives now and I can find him...and we can be together again...

* * *

Chapter 4 end

Well, this may be short, around 3-4 chapters left, maybe. I never planned it to be long, and I've lost a bit of the plot, but yeah. I promise you'll ha- I mean love me for this fic. XD Review please~!


End file.
